Confession...
I've got a confession to make.
I'm a fraud.
Or should I say I feel like a fraud.
You see I'm writing this blog from my sick bed today because I have trouble practising what I preach.
I'm always telling everyone else to make sure they take time out of their busy schedule for self care - a massage, a healing, regular meditation, feeding their bodies with healthy and nutritious meals BUT here's the thing I have a lot of trouble doing that for myself.
Hey, I'm a single parent (excuse), I run 2 businesses (excuse), I also do some contract work (excuse), in other words I'm busy (EXCUSEEEEEEE)!!!!
Too busy it seems to heed my own advice and have some down time every now and then - to get a regular massage - to prepare and cook nutritious meals every day - to practise some yoga or indulge in a creative endeavour that isn't attached to my work.
Don't get me wrong I love my life. I love it when a client let's out one of those "I'm so spaced out and relaxed right now" snuffly snorts half way through a massage. It makes my day :)
BUT...
This week I've been forced to stop and really take a deep look at my behaviour and beliefs to try and understand why I take on more than I should. Why do I find it so easy to say YES to everyone else and NO to myself? I think to some extent it comes from a place of lack, "If I say no to this booking perhaps they won't come back" I think some of it comes from a "I'm not good enough" belief but more to the point it comes from me being in the habit of being a people pleaser (again this boils down to I'm not good enough so I'll do whatever it takes to get people to like me).
I don't like to disappoint so rather than setting some firm boundaries I just say YES even if it means I don't have time for a healthy dinner or a much needed sleep in on the weekend or some down time in the evening.
As it is I have felt like I have disappointed people this week, I've had to cancel a lot of bookings these past few days. I want to give my clients the best of me and I can't do that if I'm sick.
Guess what happened?
Everyone was very understanding they had no problem rescheduling their appointments. So my beliefs that they wouldn't come back (lack) have been false. You know what else is a false belief the one about me not being good enough.
Yes I'm a work in progress and the more I work on myself the more I find that needs work.
I love it.
Peeling back those layers each day to transform my life and the lives of those around me......
